Make my way from my apartment on the twelth floor down to the lobby, gripping coffee in one unmanicured claw, and carrying a large empty tote bag (because there are approximately 1945826876283 pieces of tupperware and travel coffee mugs scattered around my office that WILL make it BACK to aforementioned apartment. today. so. help. me. god.).
Step out door,
Slight side-step around very tottery-looking homeless man which was in fact a side-step towards very skeezy looking skateboarder/hitchhiker/graffiti artist/alternative lifestyle individual who promptly asked me in an extremely congenial tone "Hey, can I become your sex slave?"
No sir, the position has been filled (haa..) but thank you for noticing that I used not one but TWO different shades of eye shadow today.
Pretty well-coiffed INDEED.
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